Final Words

Sometimes, a lover becomes so helpless, that irrespective of the fact that he loves his partner like a hypnotized mess, he still can't; at any cost, show the value of the relationship and keep the person close.

This helplessness slits the heart from every corner, angle and makes it bleed agony and loneliness.

Things which were a part of self-treasure become a part of obsession and suffocation. But, then the heart and soul refuse to give-up and try to survive.

Survive - when this starts to happen, then obviously you have stopped Living. Believe it or not, Love teaches you how to LIVE not how to just SURVIVE.

I happen to know a lover, who failed and became abusive to his own existence, but never, ever, did he stop thinking about the person that meant all to him and he continues to keep the lover in his memory- till date!

He Writes and I Quote......

"It’s strange to think and imagine that things have failed between us. It was not too long ago, when, I told you that I wanted to be with you forever and then getting the consent from you for the same, changed me as a person completely.

A misguided boy, that I was, got a way to move ahead and do things in life and do it for good. Do it for US. The small meetings turned out to be the joyous admiration and trust, which I thought there was.

Little did I know, about what I was to see and what it would be termed as!

I always loved holding your fingers in between mine, cuddle them and be a kid, I so wanted to be, when I was a child. You; brought it back to me!

I used to cherish yours and my tears when we would sit and think about bad things that might happen to us, and get scared, while we used to fail to find a solution.

The smiles I would see, when I would surprise you suddenly by visiting you, was my best gift to myself and I would think, man, can’t I do this every day? Every hour? Every minute? Every second?

To my disarray, even this was termed wrong.

I started making mistakes when I got insecure. Imagining that I would lose you as there were people I was sharing you with, which I never wanted to.

And though I was rated as the top guy, I was never visible like one.

VISIBLE, that was all that I wanted. To be seen with you. Stand with you. And the pride in our eyes for being with each other. Why couldn't that happen?

My surprises were termed to be an act to deceive and I, shallow and a person who couldn't respect love. I died every time I heard that. I cried my soul out every-time I felt those words resonating in my ears. No one could see it though.

Not even you!

I slowly did become vulnerable, after all, I was, and I am not a machine. The mere desire to be with you and not share you with others, which any lover would like to hear, became my drawback and I was told that it was nothing, but my obsession.

Maybe it was!

But my obsession was you! How was I wrong there?

Never did I think of anyone else to be at your place, as you had so lovingly captured me. I loved being with you, lie down with you, cared for by you and cherish you. I kept fighting for my identity and to overcome everyone and be the right one, to be yours, which I am proud to say that I was (am) and someday even you would realize it. I gave my best and I gave my honesty, which was all I had and have to offer and can’t give/offer anything else besides it.

Whenever I told you I love you I meant each breath connected to it, to be passed to you, and reside in you so that you could smell me in your soul and be there with me even when I was not around. CHOKED …who??? The answer is still unknown to me!

I always tried to be brave and not those pretending type people, who would see you commit a mistake but would not have the balls to talk about it and say – you made a mistake! Is that wrong? Was I not to make you better and you make me?

No one is perfect and in love, people try to make each other perfect, they don’t scrutinize or disrespect.

I did not! How could I?

I just wanted my love to know life and its shortcomings and be the person who could stand even without me and fight. A person people would want to die for to be with and look at for inspiration. In return but- I was termed to be a spy who would find hindrances and be an obstacle.

I wasn’t!

The rainbows and stars and moons and sugar-coated poetry are just a mean to drool, but did I not try those too?

All said and done, I was your lover, but you have moved on, however, ironically you still claim to love me. A person always falls sailing in two boats. I am just trying to save you and keep you happy and for that, I must move out and I would do that if that could keep things simple for you.

I know it would be tough, I also know it would hurt badly…so bad that I would cry every moment when I am awake-but for you, I WOULD TAKE IT.

I bid goodbye and surrender everything I had. Thank you for loving me as I also loved ….I love you"

Final WORDS!